


Pause

by NachoDiablo



Series: Sam Wilson Bingo [5]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Thor (Movies)
Genre: Avengers: Endgame (Movie), Gen, Grief/Mourning, Minor Steve Rogers/Sam Wilson, Missing Scene, Pre-Thorkyrie
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-24
Updated: 2021-01-24
Packaged: 2021-03-16 15:54:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,148
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28959027
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NachoDiablo/pseuds/NachoDiablo
Summary: After the snap, Steve visits New Asgard.
Relationships: Brunnhilde | Valkyrie & Steve Rogers
Series: Sam Wilson Bingo [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2046332
Comments: 6
Kudos: 13
Collections: Sam Wilson Bingo 2020





	Pause

**Author's Note:**

> This is a bonus fill for the Sam Wilson Bingo square "Presumed Dead." I didn't think it was Sam-centric enough to stand on its own. But I'm including it here anyway just for some extra fun :D

Steve hadn’t planned on visiting New Asgard, but Natasha asked him to make the trip. Thor hadn’t been heard from in months. Steve tried to insist that they allow Thor his time to process, but watching Natasha attempt to hide her worry made him feel guilty. Too much responsibility had already shifted to her shoulders. If this eased her burden even a little bit, Steve would do it.

If he’d known Thor’s situation was going to be this rough, he’d have come sooner.

“Thanks for stopping by, I suppose.” Valkyrie shrugged one shoulder apologetically as she walked him back to the quinjet. With Thor refusing to leave his house, she had been the one to show him around. “Sorry you had to see him like that.”

Steve shook his head. “It’s a difficult time for all of us.” 

Trite words, for what they’d lost, but Valkyrie smiled in sympathy. “I’ll try to keep in contact more regularly. Until he snaps out of it.  _ If  _ he snaps out of it.”

“I understand.” Steve rested a hand on her shoulder. “Second starts… they’re a struggle. If there’s anything you need, let us know. Please.”

She glanced down at his hand with a frown, then looked up at him, her bright eyes narrowed ever so slightly. Steve found himself caught in her gaze, mesmerized as her expression softened.

“Actually, there’s some Midgard paperwork I could use some advice on. If you can spare a few more hours. I’ll toss in a free meal, too, if that makes it any more tempting.”

Steve smiled. It  _ was  _ tempting, an excuse not to go back to the compound just yet. He gave her shoulder a squeeze. “It’d be my pleasure.”

~

“I watched her fall.” The words echoed numbly over the steam of Valkyrie’s mug. They’d shared a pleasant dinner as they sorted the paperwork; now they sat under the stars on the low roof of Valkyrie’s house. 

Valkyrie had offered tea as an after dinner drink, something spicy and floral that warmed away a chill Steve hadn’t realized he’d been carrying. Their traded stories had faded from amusing to aching. Now they’d slipped into the grim.

“I’ve been there,” Steve said with a painful smile. What a thing to commiserate over so casually. “My best friend. ‘Course he came back. For a while, anyway.”

“Yeah, I heard.”

Steve looked over at her, one eyebrow raised. She shrugged and took a sip of her tea.

“Plenty of downtime on the journey to Earth. Thor’s a good storyteller. I’ve heard every Avenger’s grand tale a few times over.”

Something raw cracked through her voice. Steve shifted over so his shoulder could nudge against hers. “I don’t wanna be out of line, but are you and Thor, uh, together? Or  _ were  _ you, before all this? Sorry if that’s too personal.”

Valkyrie seemed amused. “How polite of you, Captain. Nice to see at least chivalry’s not dead.”

Steve rolled his eyes good-naturedly as she chuckled and shook her head.

“No, we aren’t together. We… I was guarded, and he respected that. It wasn’t the right time anyway, trapped on a ship hurtling towards gods-know-what. Now we’re here, and  _ he’s  _ the one who’s guarded. Only I can’t cut through his armor the way he did mine.”

“I’m sure you didn’t make it easy for him,” Steve said.

“Nope,” Valkyrie replied with a smirk. “But maybe I should have.”

Steve sighed and stared into his mug. “Trust me, romance during war isn’t easy. I tried waiting the first time around. Still hurt like hell when I lost her. Then I met Sam, and, well. Losing him hurt plenty, too.”

“Sam is the Falcon?” Valkyrie asked. “Thor said you two were together.”

“Married,” Steve corrected, then he flinched. “I mean, not really. It wasn’t legal or anything. Didn’t even get the chance to exchange rings.”

“Things don’t have to be legal to be real. Trust me, I know.”

“Me too,” Steve grinned. He sighed and looked up at the stars, more vibrant than New York’s sky could ever offer. “You probably made the right choice, waiting. Romance complicates things. Natasha and I, we’re struggling without Sam. He and I were together, but the three of us, we were a team. With Sam missing, she and I are off kilter. It’s… complicated.”

He hadn’t considered just how complicated it was until now, away from the oppressive weight of everyday life. He and Sam had been inseparable since their first meeting. Their individual connections with Natasha were informed by that dynamic in more ways than Steve realized.

And now he grieved for more than just his lost husband. He grieved for his friendships, as a trio and with Natasha alone, irrevocably altered.

“Everything’s complicated.” Valkyrie set her empty tea mug aside and wrapped her arms around her knees. “Don’t ever regret your happiness.”

“Yes, ma’am.” Steve did a mock salute as he set down his own mug.

“It’s odd,” Valkyrie mused. “How losing your whole world over and over gets easier and harder at the same time.”

Steve shook his head. “I don’t think it gets easier. We just numb ourselves a little more each time. Doesn’t stop the damage, though. And maybe that’s worse for healing, in the long run.”

“Probably.” Valkyrie sighed and hugged her knees tighter against her chest. “It makes me feel especially stupid this time around. Thor’s not dead, but he’s lost all the same. I know damn well how pointless it is to try and force someone out of a wallow before they’re ready. I can’t do  _ nothing, _ and yet that is  _ all  _ I can do.”

Tears sparked in her eyes as she met his gaze. “How do you mourn someone who’s still flesh and blood in front of you?”

Wordlessly, Steve lifted an arm, and she tucked herself under it. Her head rested against his chest as she shook with quiet sobs. Steve rested his head atop hers and let his own tears slide silently down his cheeks.

~

Sunrise found them on the roof as the stars blinked away into the pinks and reds of dawn. They remained wrapped together in quiet comfort. Steve got the impression that Valkyrie did not allow herself to be vulnerable often, which he understood. It felt good to support a friend in a grief that was shared, but less complicated than what he’d left back at the compound.

And maybe this was something he  _ could  _ fix, at least partly. He’d been tossing around the idea of support groups. Maybe New Asgard could do with one, too. The Avengers had left the Asgardians to their own devices once Thor was gone. Steve promised himself that he’d talk to Natasha and Rhodey to correct that as soon as he returned home.

Steve had lost his happy ending, but he would do everything he could to make sure Valkyrie and Thor found theirs.

**Author's Note:**

> Maybe this is an AU where Thor gets the help he needs sooner. Maybe Steve is inspired to search for solutions and he frees Scott earlier. Or maybe nothing changes and the story unfolds as it always did. Thoughts?


End file.
